Oh. My. Gosh.

So all last week I was feeling slightly off. Monday I had a fever and felt exhausted, then Tuesday and Wednesday were OK, then Thursday I had a fever again. I just figured I was getting sick.

I wasn't.

Friday morning my eyes popped open at 5:00am (my alarm's set for 6:00am) after having a dream that I took a pregnancy test and it clear as day said in black letters "Preggo" (funny, right?). At this point I was technically like 3 days late, but that wasn't a big deal and if I hadn't started by Saturday I was going to take a test. But then I thought "Well, if I'm pregnant now it's not like I'm going to be anymore pregnant on Saturday." So I got up and took a test.

One line. Totally normal. I've taken tests before because I'm that girl who always thinks she's pregnant (probably because I never have been before, so I didn't know what to look for.) So I brush my teeth and am taking off my makeup and what's this? Is that another line? Maybe I have makeup remover in my eye, maybe I'm still blurry from sleep... Nope. That's another line! *expletive*

The expletive was more from shock than anything else. I didn't really expect it to come out positive. I guess maybe I was used to negative every time I took one.

Friday was a weird day for me. I was full of swimming nerves. I imagined telling people and me being me I always picture the worst reaction. I was so nervous! I did tell my friend Beth (she's a mom, too) and asked her to look at the test with me to make sure I was reading it right. She said that's what hers looked like. So I started chugging water so at my lunch I could take another test, though this time it was the +/- kind. And wouldn't you know it? It errored out! I think it was because I was drinking too much water and it diluted out the hormones? That's my guess. I could sort of see a faint plus sign, but I wasn't sure. So after work I went and bought the digital yes/no tests and they were a definite YES. By the way, I totally recommend those ones so you're not wondering if you're seeing things.

I STILL didn't tell Zack that night. I was just so nervous! I guess I thought he might be mad (which is totally ridiculous, but you know, I was all doomy.) So Saturday I showed up at his work and told him to come with me to my car and I showed him my tests.

"Oh my God, you're pregnant!" he said.

But he was smiling.

He's totally excited! He called everyone on his contact list on his cellphone last night. My Mom cried, my sister was speechless, and my Dad even cried. I'm not sure if Snoopy cried, but she seemed excited, too.

And what about me?

I'm feeling so much better. I felt a whole lot better after I told Zack, and the more people I told, the better I felt. I'm getting totally excited! I'm terrified, but excited. And it's amazing how you take better care of yourself when you know someone elses life depends on you, too. I know it's only been 3 days, but I had some Sierra Mist yesterday and I felt bad! I'm all about the water now. It's still pretty surreal, and I think it will be more real after I get my first ultrasound (on Nov. 13th) so I can see or hear something. Proof, you know? At any rate, I think I'm totally in love again.

I really hope everything goes OK. I know some couples choose not to tell people until after the first trimester, but it's totally hard to keep that kind of secret! I dare you to try!

So, now the stats: First doctor's visit is November 13th (pray for us that it's only one little heartbeat. It's totally possibly for us to have multiples as we both have them in our families.) The due date is June 29th, 2010. In the first part of January is when we ought to be able to find out the gender. And I'm currently 5 weeks along. :)

On the Other Hand, I have Chai and Cashmere...

So, The start of a new week, and a new month, and a new season! As much complaining I do about the cold, I really do enjoy the fall. It's inspiring! It makes me want to knit, and sew, and cook, and really makes me wish I took a Home Ec class.


But today it really is coooooold. There's snow up on the mountains and I'll grant them they're very pretty. I'm at least happy that I don't live anywhere desolate. I like the variety of weather and of the terrain. If Colorado had a beach, it'd be the most perfect place to live. We have mountains and rivers and deserts and lakes and snow and dirt and rocks and trees and animals and 300 days of sunshine. Also we have so many different kinds of people: Cowboys and hippies and yuppies and blue-collar and white-collar. I guess I should count myself among the blessed, restless though I am.


It's amazing to me how different all of my blog posts are! One day I hate my job, and the next I'm excited for snow? Whoa. Those of you who read my blog must be exhausted! And speaking of my job, I'm ok with it. I am still keeping my eyes wide for another oppotunity, but hey, at least I have a job. Again, one among the blessed.


And I'm grateful for my husband! I feel bad for him because I'm not always the most affectionate, but I do love him very much. Adore, even! He really is the epitome of a great husband. He can fix things, and he can cook, and he helps me, and he believes in me, and most importantly he loves me. There's only one other man who rivals Zack for the position of #1 in my life, and that's my dad.

And all of my friends! I only have a handful of close ones, but that's all I need. I wish they all lived closer though.

Something I realized lately is that I have a lot of mother-figures, and I'm so amazed by that. My Mom, Snoopy, Paula, Pam, Oma, and Kathy to name a few. It's great to have so many different spouts of advice available to me.

I'm not rich and I wasn't brought up rich and now that I'm grown I wouldn't have it any other way. It doesn't matter. Going through school I was always intimidated by the rich girls who were so shiny I could see my reflection most days. I don't know how they're all doing or where they all are, but I hope the glitter took them where they wanted to be. I know that I'm almost where I want to be.

A Blog Just to Blog....

I haven't written in awhile, but that's because I don't know what to write about! Not much has been going on... Let's see....

I signed Indie (my little female dog) up for this program called D-SNIP. It's a low cost spay and neuter program for local animals. I donated $40 to the organization and they gave me a ceritficate that allows Indie to get spayed for free at Aspen Tree Vet Clinic. It was going to cost me about $250-$300 at the vet we've been going to, so $40 is AWESOME!

Also, we've had our first freeze and my garden died. But don't cry for me because I got a lot of great veggies from it. I had so much squash I didn't know what to do with it all, and I still have some tomatoes ripening in the house, and I pulled all my carrots. So I still have a lot of enjoying to do.

Zack and I found a gym to join, too! It's cool because they're aren't any enrollment fees, and it's about 24/7! We haven't actually signed up but that only because we have to meet with the owner to sign up and we can't seem to find corresponding times between our work schedules to meet him... But soon!! Hopefully this week.

I dyed my hair last night! And Zack bought me some hot-rollers so I can curl it in the morning! I LOVE it! My hair's like a dark auburn now. I will post pictures on FaceBook tonight.

Zack and I are getting our pictures taken this week. That ought to be fun! I'm still not decided on where we're going to get them done, though! I'm thinking on the river trail behind the mall... That usually doesn't have a whole lot of people. Any suggestions?

As far as work goes, it's still all the same. I guess it's a little better now that my attitude's changed, but I'm still on the lookout for a job I won't refuse. There was an Account Executive (which I'm pretty sure that means "Ad sales person") opening for the radio station that I sent my resume to, but I'm not sure my resume is impressive enough. I think I'd be good at it though.

And my book! Ah, my book! I really like where it's going, but I haven't written in it in a couple of weeks. I haven't been motivated. I need to just psych myself up with some awesome scenarios so I'll want to put it to paper. Believe me, I'm thinking....

I bought some new winter boots that just got here today. They're pretty sweet. I've never had real winter boots before. I almost wish it would snow so I could wear them! ...almost...

Anyway, I guess that pretty much brings me up to date with you all.

xoxox